we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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