Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
We talked him into tasing himself.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
