He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
