sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize
