Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
