she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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