Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
