smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
