hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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