I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize