If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Randomize
