your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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