i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
