Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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