What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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