btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
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After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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