hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
