I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
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