my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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