He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
