he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Randomize