Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
