that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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