I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
