People in love make me want to vomit
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I'm too high and old for this...
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
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