That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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