3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
