I wannas sexs uuuuu
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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