You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I fill condoms, not promises.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
