Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
It's just like the Real World with babies
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Randomize
