"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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