Where is the hickey?
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Randomize
