he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize