With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
His hands were made for my vagina.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Randomize
