I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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