so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
