Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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