I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I just want to make out with him forever
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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