So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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