I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
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