You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Randomize
