You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Randomize
