If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
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I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
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After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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