yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
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Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
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I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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