I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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