you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
You're completely useless in the revolution.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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