wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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