so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
