have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
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