it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
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