Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
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